Sparks *

When I woke up again, I was staring up at the darkening sky. The sun was close to disappearing, painting both the sky and the ocean in a mix between a deep amber colour and other less prominent shades of red. I could just barely make out the darkness of the night. Clouds of the same shade rolled by slowly, some blocking the magnificent rays that sent warmth coursing through my body and others looking like they'd been drawn to the sky. I sat up at a snail's pace, happy that I wasn't feeling as much pain as I had been before. Touching my face, I sighed in relief. The irritation was pretty much gone after resting for what I could tell was a very long time. There was a hint of sunburn on my nose, though.

But aside from all that, the sight of stars was going to be a nice change, and one I would greatly appreciate. At least then I would have something to look at while I mourned my dead comrades.

"Alright, stop, Haruka. That's enough for now. You just woke up." I scolded myself, but it didn't help the pain settling in my heart again. I sighed, exasperated, and pushed some stray strands of my short hair back. I placed a hand on my stomach, hearing the familiar rumbling that screamed hunger. Gripping my clothing, I blew air through my mouth to distract myself.

How long have I been here? It felt like I'd been here for so long.

"Two… wait, no… three days?" I rasped, my throat dry and my lips cracked. I chose not to talk a lot, not wanting to make them bleed, but… Three days. I'd been on this godforsaken piece of wood for three days. And I was probably going to be here for longer.

At the sight of stars, I halted my inner complaints, the twinkling spots curling my lips into a small, yet still woeful, smile. They sparkled and shone so bright, I just couldn't help it.

I'd usually stay up late stargazing when I was back on my ship, the stars coming out and dotting the sky in white. Back then, things had been much more simpler and undemanding from me. I didn't have that big of a crew back then, so there were times when I could sit alone for a while recollecting my thoughts and making plans for the future. I looked down at my hands at the memory.

"Are… are you guys up there?" I asked quietly, my eyes snapping upwards again. I got no answer, but it didn't stop me from voicing my thoughts.

"I'm really sorry, you know. I know you guys are probably… really mad at me for leaving you like that but," I paused, laughing dryly before inhaling in an attempt to stop the shaking in my voice, "But I'm going to… I'm going to…" I sighed.

"I-I don't know what I'm going to do, but, ah, I promise I'll figure it out. I'll get those marines back for what they did."

There wasn't an answer still—why would there be?—but I felt at ease. I had finally gotten those words off my chest, and now I had made a promise, so I had to keep living. I nodded, biting my lip as my eyes stared at the sky, not really focusing on anything.

I had to stay alive.

I had to live. I honestly didn't really know how I was going to get out of this predicament, but I had to at least try.

Deciding to sleep again, I laid back and relaxed, stretching so my limbs got some relief as I closed my eyes.

***

When I awoke, the sun was just starting to rise. Sadly, I was unable to sit up because, even though I had gotten plenty of rest, I had no energy. The lack of food was starting to take a toll on my body, not to mention the lack of water. I would've drunk from the endless supply of water around me if it weren't for the amount of salt in it.

Sighing, I let my limbs fall limp after another attempt at getting up. Of course, it was unsuccessful. Doesn't mean I couldn't try.

And so that's how I spent another 10 minutes. And after those ten minutes, I gave up completely.

Just like I had given up my crew and my ship—

"Oh, just stop it." I grumbled tiredly, shaking my head to free my mind from such depressing thoughts. I was so tired that keeping my eyes open was becoming a very strenuous task.

Not only because of my fatigue, but because despite the fact I was so sad, I was bored out of my mind. A childish thought, especially in a situation like this, but I couldn't help it. I was alone, and the last conversation I had taken part of had been a desperate monologue since the sea beast couldn't speak.

My eyes scanned the area, taking in the sight of what looked like a small ship from my position. I ignored it, too tired to—WAIT.

"That's—that's a ship—" I said stupidly. "That's—that's…" I trailed off, whatever words I had been about to say dying at the tip of my tongue. I heaved in a breath, my chest hurting again. Was it heading this way? I couldn't tell; my vision was too blurred. Why was it blurred? Why am I so tired? Why now? I had to move if I wanted them to see me!

Sadly, that was easier said than done. When I attempted to move, the large gash on my side reopened, and my mouth fell open in a silent cry of agony.

"Fu—" I gasped, the excruciating pain I was feeling spreading all throughout my body.

I just had to be on the verge of passing out, didn't I?

My body trembled violently as tears rolled down my cheeks again.

It was no use. There was no point in trying, anyway. The ship would probably pass me by and whoever was aboard would ignore me. My heart raced at the thought of being on this raft any longer, but I just couldn't move anymore.

Fuelled by panic, I finally managed to raise one of my arms, attempting some sort of wave, before it fell beside me again. my vision was so blurry I could barely make out the outline of the ship anymore. Where did it go?

"No, no, no! Not you, too!" I sobbed, the blood leaving my body forming a puddle beside me.

***

It had been… Fuck, I didn't know, six days? Has it almost been a week? Has it really been that long?

…Fuck. I wasn't going to last much longer.

After the ship had completely ignored me, I broke down again and cried while my side kept bleeding. The pain flowing through me doubled when a sob shook my entire frame, which made me cry more.

All in all, I felt pathetic.

This was not how a pirate was supposed to act. They were meant to be ruthless, merciless, not weak little babies.

But I couldn't help it. I had never been that kind of person. When I had had the chance, I had let whatever marine that survived the storm that was my crew go with a threat that never fell on deaf ears. I was compassionate when I needed to be, not like many other pirates, who would kill and be known for killing only.

I wanted to say I was a pirate, not a murderer.

I still had no strength in me, so movement, again, was a big no-no. So I laid there, unmoving, probably looking like a corpse and feeling like one.

Several small ships had passed by, now. I knew some of them saw me, and I tried to get their attention, but their captains would bark an order to their troubled sailors and they would be gone as quickly as they came.

And just like the sea beast moment I had, it made me feel awful. Were people really this cruel out here? It made me remember all the decisions I've made in my rather short lifetime and question if I had made the right choice. Had I made the right choice in leaving home? Had I made the right choice in becoming a pirate?

It sure as hell didn't feel like it.

And now I am going to pay for my wrong-doings with my life.

It all seemed rather appropriate, and I was more than ready to accept the fact that I was not going to survive. The sound of seagulls overhead was a sound I welcomed, having grown sick of the waves. I didn't know why there were seagulls here, but I wasn't about to question it.

The second I got off this thing I was going to go home. Screw the life of piracy and alcoholic drinks, I was going to go home and stick to whatever job I came across.

Of course, I couldn't do that. I'd be recognized, chased, killed, and I'll die without avenging my crew.

But I was just so sick of everything. My mind was such a mess, I was seeing things. Right now, I was seeing a whale—a whale with the weirdest look on its face I had ever seen—heading towards me. And were those flags on top of it—actually, were those masts?

Holy shit.

That's a ship.

Well, another one anyways, and I wasn't as overjoyed as I was the first time a ship came around, so I ignored it, just like they had all ignored me. I still couldn't help that sliver of hope building up in my heart, though, and I sighed shakily, too weak to really curse anything.

I waited for it to pass and failed to acknowledge my existence.

I sniffed; my eyes squeezed shut as I fell into a strange sleep-like state. I wasn't really asleep though, since I could still make out all the sounds around me. The swaying of the waves I had grown so used to was disturbed as the enormous whale-thing moved by me, and then I was hearing voices.

One particularly loud, booming voice almost snapped me out of my weird state, but since I hadn't made out whatever they had said, I stayed the way I was. I was so lost in my own world that I didn't feel my raft being moved closer to the whale, and then suddenly I felt like I was floating.

Is this what death feels like? Because it sure feels like—

I was dropped onto the floor again.

"Shit! Be careful, you fool!" A voice hissed, before a hand was touching my face, "He's still alive, Pops. What do we do?" A pause, "He's pretty beat up." The deep voice said.

I was sick of being awake and buried so deep within my own thoughts that I missed what the abnormally large captain said.

Wait, had the guy said he? Could he not see that I was obviously a—oh right. I had cut my hair to give myself a more masculine appearance… Had my ridiculous plan actually worked? Or was the guy just joking around? Well, coupled with the heavy clothing I wore, I supposed the mistake (or was it actually a mistake?) couldn't be helped.

It wasn't until I was heaved off of the ground did I realize with a shaking exhale I was saved. I grunted in pain when the person lifting me up brushed their hand over my side. I knew I was going to freak out when I woke up, but right now I couldn't care less.

I was finally saved, and that's all that mattered to me right now.